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In Which I Lose My Innocence

 Twilight.

So I found a copy at Larisa's house, and she let me borrow it.

And, um...yeah.

My eyes rolled so much that I'm still dizzy.

To paraphrase our president-elect:  You can put lipstick on a pig, and it's still a pig.  You can put strawberry-scented shampoo and sparkles on a steaming cow patty, and it's still a steaming cow patty.

Of course I need to read the next one now.  

Comments

There is still hope. I picked up the next one and read it about halfway through and stopped. Just plain stopped. Because it's just that boring.
You give me something to hold on to. My deepest thanks.
I skimmed my way through the first 3, was never able to finish Breaking Dawn.
I skimmed quite a bit of the book, but it was like running at a good clip and then tripping over a piece of godawful purple prose. You just have to look back in shock at the ivory-skinned Adonis of an adolescent sex fantasy and thank the stars that you weren't hurt worse in the process.
Well shit on me, you've fallen too! Now it's just me and Skyblade against the world.
It finally got to the point where I realized that I was mostly holding back my curiosity because too many other people were into it, which to me is just as bad as reading it because so many others are doing so.
I don't know, if it were really good and I wasn't reading it because everyone else was, then maybe there'd be a problem. But I don't see an issue with not reading it because it's complete crap that everyone else is reading.

Oh, I understand that. I meant that my own curiosity was more overwhelming than I was willing to admit, but I was ignoring it in order to not be part of the crowd.

However, having read it, I find little to discuss. Amusing, yes, but not worthy of too much of my time and attention online or offline.
Don't lie, you know you want to spend the next 14 hours writing fanfic and designing anti-Twilight websites and photoshopping images of Robert Whatshisface.

But seriously, that's cool that you gave them a whirl. I really don't care what people read (except when they front about why they're reading it), I was just giving you a hard time. :)
Hmph. I'm still far too busy with my 1000 page epic that will fix all of the things that Rowling got wrong in Deathly Hallows.
Barack reads that crap to his daughters. I was saddened when I heard that sometime around election day.
I can just picture him getting to the stalky parts.

"Now, you know that if a boy ever does this to you, he'll be blown away by several highly trained men with powerful assault weapons, right?"
As they say in Cleoland, you are a lolfan:
"I pretty much made up this word just now to describe the kind of people (i.e., me) who read these books for the sole purpose of snarking on them and yet cannot stop oh God please send help. Levels of affection for the subject matter may vary; macros and icons are often involved. Twatlighters (see below) are a good example of lolfans."
Cleo was the one who first brought the stupid things to my attention. We've been friendly acquaintances since I was involved behind the scenes of a pop culture forum we both frequent.

I've actually been putting off reading them due to the fact that the forum is now overpopulated with twatlighters.
I have strong suspicions that many (not all, but more than a few) people who "only read them for the LULZ" secretly really like them but are too embarrassed to admit it. Which is extra irritating. I mean, we all have guilty reading pleasures! Just own up to it, don't pretend that you're spending 10 hours a day on it only for the IRONY.
I think that a few of them are, but the vast majority seem to truly like it. However, many seem to have found a balance with "I see how stupid it is, but I have a real fondness all the same." Kind of how I feel about Billy Joel.